the thrift store i work at sells halloween stuff in the fall and today when i was ringing this lady up she turned around and looked at a zombie pig mask we had and i asked her if she wanted it and she said “this would help deter ISIS”

o-dawgtheinvincible:

sigmarikz:

certaflyably:

thirstingaintdead:

Top 3 phrases that’ll create sexual tension

  1. "Make me",
  2. "oh really",
  3. "is that so"

"prove it"

"What’s in it for me?"

"The Black Death was one of the most devastating pandemics in human history, resulting in the deaths of an estimated 75 to 200 million people and peaking in Europe in the years 1348–50 CE."

jerkofficial:

jerkofficial:

lets play a game, guess what im eating

image

image

american-fuckin-horror-story:

i got out of bed at 11:30 to make this

officialunitedstates:

you’re brushing your teeth when suddenly your mint toothpaste tastes like eggs. do you

a)  power through and continue brushing
b)  wash your mouth out
c)  go to your fridge and get out the eggs and bite one to see if it tastes minty

thingsdrawnonorphanblack:

CUTIE ON THE RED CARPET

thingsdrawnonorphanblack:

CUTIE ON THE RED CARPET

maggotmaster: